Listen to the text as a podcast:
If there was a female version of Ozhegov’s explanatory dictionary in nature, then, probably, the weighty, bold such question mark would be opposite the word “treason”. And all because the girls with this case and the truth are damn ambiguous. I met people who — under the influence of free alcohol, hormonal bursts, a retrograde Jupiter — could get into a fast sex with some hard-core bartender before fast sex and not even experience anything like remorse.
“Well, what is this treason ?! - my friend was perplexed, inadvertently saying that on vacation she "accidentally" slept with a local waiter. - So, nonsense, I don’t even remember his name. It's like a vibrator. Or, in your opinion, is it also a betrayal? ”My other gender sisters, on the contrary, grow from a diplodocus fly and walk with a black face with longing and remorse, despite the fact that there was just a slight flirtation. And not even aggravated by any tactility. “What difference does it make that we haven’t slept ?! - another friend of mine was indignant, who got into the habit of conducting spicy conversations on ICQ with a work colleague. - I had thoughts about him and sex with him. For me, this alone is treason. ”
In short, there is no, and it seems, no consensus is foreseen on what to consider treason in general. The very fact of copulation with an extraneous man? And if everything seems to have started, but then the girl gave up on the brakes and, in fact, didn’t get to the penetration? And when, let’s say, only with hands - is it considered? And kissing for a long time and with feeling - is it nonsense, a matter of everyday life, or is there also something to talk about? And how, in this case, to qualify the sex by SMS or frivolous chat conversations, after which the panties are at least squeezed? Therefore, I propose to narrow the scope of the discussion and talk about the signs of the novel that has just begun on the side - that is, situations where not only the organs that are usually worn in shorts, but also feelings are involved.
I suspect, dear reader, you yourself have a lot to say on this subject. And, perhaps, even you had occasion to poke the nose of a friend / brother / colleague / neighbor into irrefutable facts and pronounce the sacramental "Open your eyes!". But I allow myself to note that it is human nature to show miracles of observation and deduction when it comes to someone else. Outsider. Another thing is when everything happens literally in your personal space. And late, not some abstract person returns home with panties in her pocket, but your own woman. Here, as far as I could see, “homo sapiens” very often evolve into ostriches - they bury their heads in the sand (read: they bury themselves in work, telly or a book) and until the last refuse to believe the obvious.
In case you suddenly have some unpleasant aching feeling from time to time, as if something is wrong, I prepared a cheat sheet that will help you figure out if a hunch or a girlfriend is deceiving you? If in more than three points you recognize your girlfriend, you have to admit: it is regrettable, but she began an affair on the side.
1. She suddenly stopped digging into you
For some unknown reason, the girl suddenly stopped bitching, rolling up jealousy scenes, paying attention to unexposed bins and your barbaric habit of picking your teeth with a screwdriver. You can, of course, assume that it was not for nothing that you choked on burnt paper to the chiming clock, and Grandfather Frost finally deigned to fulfill your wish. But, rather, nevertheless, the girl’s behavior is explained by the fact that her focus of attention has shifted and she simply stopped paying attention to you. I suspect that you may not be in the know: very often a woman is sawing, harassing you with complaints and expressing her dissatisfaction with and without, not at all because she is a sadist and a hysterical woman. But because (just please, do not laugh), that she holds on to you, loves and does not want to stop loving one fine day because of some damned buckets and teeth there. This is called “fighting for relationships” in female jargon.
Now, when the romance on the side is just beginning, your friend has not yet managed to break the car of firewood, become entangled in a fake alibi and finally wallow in lies and debauchery. She is not ashamed and dreamy, but, on the contrary, fun, good and courageous. She finally feels lively and interesting. So at this stage, she does not care about what is happening to you - and to you as a couple. Yes, surely then, when remorse begins to torment her, she will transform into a real vixen. And how to give it a drink, it will break through to convict you of treason - thereby projecting onto you what is happening to herself, and trying to find an excuse for her own non-kosher behavior (and the best excuse is usually that you are a sloppy bummer and a womanizer yourself literally forced her into the arms of another). But it will be later. In the meantime, a blissful calm. And I hope I managed to convince you that it should alert you.
By the way, one of the “classic signs” of betrayal is an increase in housekeeping when a girl, for the removal of suspicions and pacification of the voice of conscience, non-stop cooks, scatters and cleanses, - in my opinion, it is not particularly relevant at the stage of the origin of the left-wing novel. The girl, I repeat, is now in the clouds. And in this state, we are usually not up to plungers and dumplings. Therefore, most likely, she will shamelessly skimp on her duties at home and not shy away from feeding you semi-finished foods for dinner.
2. She made new friends
She used to have no one to go to with “P. S. I love you ”(no matter how you pleaded with her to enjoy the sobbing Butler in the company of girls, and you are generously saved from this torture). And now she spends most of the evenings this week with Nadenki, Irishka and Olenka, who came from nowhere. On the one hand, “I'll be late, I’m meeting with Olenka, well, you remember, this is the one we met on Pilates” - it can be a banal lie. Not Olenka there, but some whiskered Leo Venediktovich and a reserved hotel room, of which you, of course, are not supposed to know.
On the other hand, it really can be new friends. Because the old guard is not a fact that he will praise his goods for Lev Venediktovich and everything that they do there on state sheets. Especially if you and a girl have been together for a long time, her friends managed to come to terms with your candidacy and even began to sympathize with your couple. Instead of giving the traitor the opportunity to savor the details of an unauthorized novel, they can easily condemn her, admonish and spoil the mood with their highly moral: “Are you really stupid ?! What the hell Leo, besides Venediktovich ?! March home! ”But the woman needs to pour out everything painful somewhere. For this, new friends are needed, who usually, on the contrary, listen to jokes about other people's love ups and downs.
It is logical that the traitor will look at your absences with friends and business trips without conviction, as before, but calmly and even with joy. In this situation, it’s even in her hand that you will find something to do without her. Husband with business / classmates / football / Sacred 3 / new spinning means she is free to do anything and with anyone.
3. She's prettier
Blush, sparkle in the eyes, a heap of new dresses - it's all obvious and simple, like pasta in a navy style. About the dresses, by the way, for some reason is mentioned in each article about the infidelity that I have read. But, in my opinion, it is more indicative when the girl suddenly begins to pay increased attention to what is under her dress. No, I do not claim that we girls begin to do deep hair removal and pedicures, buy vicious lace and pierce the navel to screw a playful strazik there, only if we have a lover. But you must admit: the relations of people who have been together for a long time are to some extent colored by domestic licentiousness. Being a wife or a girl friend with experience, a girl can sometimes afford to stay a la still life: with spiky legs, stale armpits, peeling nail polish and chintz peas.
Another thing is if she is in the midst of an affair. Here you have to be fully armed around the clock. The life of an unfaithful woman is a sheer challenge and impromptu. It is with the husbands that they end up in bed on a predictable schedule, and they run off to their lovers early in the morning, and at lunchtime, and instead of evening Pilates training. In short, draw conclusions if your girlfriend suddenly began to behave as if she was working as a lingerie model who, without clothes, must look better than in the most luxurious dress from McQueen.
The signs of adultery are physiological.
The most successful and almost accurate option to understand what the girl has changed is to examine her body (an important sign), of course, if you already had contact. Besides inspection, you can feel the changes in the physiology of the girl in the process of bed proofs of love. If we really go deep into the recognition of betrayal, then even the smell is able to betray this fact.
So, all the most famous physiological signs of adultery of a girl, which can be recognized without leaving home:
- In the area of the buttocks there are slight redness or bluish spots, similar to hand slaps (however, remember if you could not leave these evidence),
- If she has long nails, coated with a persistent varnish on top, then look at the underside, particles of skin or blood will show an offense (during the “terminal station” many scratch the backs of lovers).
Now about the main thing: the girl’s body in life can be reconstructed only under three young men (we are talking about the intimate zone), the female representatives are focused on finding more powerful (long and wide) organs, so it’s likely that the lover “OH” has a little more. It is important not to make a mistake here, since you have only one chance.
At the time of entry, if you feel that the space has become wider and deeper than before, then this is it - treason. Before that, at a minimum, you should have 5 contacts with her, no less, then you will feel this difference.
What to say about the smell, then when a second man appears in life, it becomes tart (not so pleasant than with contacts earlier).
However, remember that the characteristics of the girl's body are much more complicated, so you should not arrange checks at the moment when she has premenstrual syndrome (PMS) or after it for three days.
If you think that it was not possible to understand the signs of adultery, then visiting gynecologists will give you a 100% guarantee. By the way, if she does not agree to go to specialists for some made-up reasons, this is an occasion to think whether she is so true, as she claims.
4. She speaks and behaves somehow differently.
One of the main symptoms of the presence of a new gentleman in the life of a woman and the fact that they have everything there seems to be serious is the suddenly changed profile of her interests. And the vocabulary, for no reason, replenished with new words. A rare girl can just sleep with a man, limiting herself to the mean “Hello. I have an hour and a half. " We also need a lover in order to talk. And in some cases - and mainly for this. Of course, a woman will inevitably absorb, like a sponge, everything that he broadcasts to her there in her spare time from bed. In short, you should be tensed if a girl suddenly begins to speculate that it is better to catch crucian carp for pearl barley and in windy weather - although you are ready to swear that before she was as far from the topic of fishing as Nadezhda Kadysheva from the title Miss Universe.
Traces of other people's influence sometimes manifest themselves in sex, which, by the way, does not always disappear from your life with a girl with the appearance of her lover. Yes, there is an opinion that the unfaithful will by all means evade conjugal duties. But this does not always happen and not with everyone. So, one of my spree friends, on the contrary, purposefully began to give her husband increased erotic attention in order to reduce his vigilance. (“A satisfied man is a curious man.”)
Another unfaithful friend behaved in the same way with her boyfriend, but without much secret intent. “Since I got Vanya (lover. - approx. Auth.), I feel such courage and drive,” she explained, “that we began to fuck more with Kolya (boyfriend. - approx. Aut.)” . Another thing is that sometimes it’s difficult not to transfer the bed preferences of a lover to a regular partner. And, between us, the aforementioned Kolya suddenly became interested in the contents of his girlfriend’s phone (and found there a lot of interesting things) not just like that, but also because she took the way to nibble his nipples during the foreplay, which he always did not tolerate. So a sudden change in sexual style can also qualify as an alarming symptom.
5. She is inseparable from a phone / tablet / computer
The girl, probably, would like to spend all her free time wrapping her legs around the lover's slender camp, but she cannot afford it for obvious reasons. Therefore, she will look for opportunities to maintain communication, at least virtually - the benefit is social networks, instant messengers, Skype and other SMS. From now on, and until the sinful connection makes a dying rattle, the phone and computer will become her best friends. Whenever you look at her, she will surely stare at the screen, constantly filling up with a Kustodievsky blush, and to your reasonable question: “Who is it so late?” Muttering something unintelligible about work or another Nadya who was allegedly bit raccoon or detained with 300 g of heroin at the Tel Aviv airport.
The main commandment of the traitor - not to leave evidence, get rid of incriminating messages and ruthlessly rub history of correspondence - a woman very often ignores. Yes, she is aware that it’s easy to burn on this. But the vague prospect of being convicted of treason (and every infidel fancies himself a conspiracy genius) is nothing compared to the opportunity to re-read it a hundred times a day, how they miss and want it so much that the lightning on jeans bursts.
Of course, she will try by all means to protect her personal life from your sudden intrusion: password protect the phone and computer, enter social networks only from her tablet, hide the devices in the closet, and lock the closet on a barn lock - despite the fact that before I scattered them wherever I got . So your completely harmless request to call from her phone or use her computer can easily bring a girl to a heart attack. She’d better eat them right before your eyes, explaining her strange behavior by the fact that she doesn’t have enough iron in her body, which allows her to touch them.
Are all girls capable of betrayal?
Fidelity laid since childhood.
An example of a family, a mother is important for a girl. It has an impact and education.
Was there a notion of “loyalty” in the girl’s family, did her parents teach how to keep a homeDo not make connections on the side. Or her own mother allowed herself liberties for her own husband.
Fidelity is embedded in the psyche as a kind of axiom. Either she is, or she is not. Of course, not all girls are capable of treason.
There are those who will not go on betrayal under any circumstances, because value and respect a partner. Nevertheless, one cannot exclude circumstances, a sudden love, with which we are not always able to control.
In contrast to fidelity, there are girls for whom adultery is natural. They do not see anything critical in this and quite calmly go on betrayal even when they are married and have children.
They say that just change once, and further there are no obstacles, including internal ones. Stops some - guilty feelings in the first place. Others understand that they have not been punished, so there are no obstacles to betrayal.
Relations are built by two people.
Much depends on how the man puts himself, whether the girl feel the inner need to be faithful no matter what.
Or her respect for the man is so absent that she can allow herself to communicate on the side without feeling guilty or remorseful.
Why does the thought of infidelity creep in?
The appearance of thoughts about a betrayal of a partner is the first news that not everything is safe. Probably, the subconscious mind noticed signals indicating that the girl is not completely honest with her man.
However, it is worth excluding pathological jealousy when a male owner suspects a girlfriend for no apparent reason, paranoia, as a character trait. It’s known that a person judges other people's actions, from my own experience.
A man who cheated himself is more likely to seek and find signs of betrayal, even if this did not actually happen.
That is happening projection of their actions on a partner.
It is much more difficult for a faithful person to notice signs of betrayal and suspect a partner, because the very concept of betrayal does not exist in his world. This is how the human psyche works.
Поэтому, предполагая измену, стоит ориентироваться не только на общепринятые признаки и собственные подозрения, но и на явные доказательства.
Что делать, если тебе признались в любви? Узнайте об этом из нашей статьи.
Как узнать, изменила пассия или нет? Признаки и как проверить:
В данном аспекте обсудим внешностные signs, что девушка изменила, они же относятся к некоторых обиходным. Необходимо просто понять, чем она отличается от той, что вы повстречали когда-то.
- You need to start with a detailed examination of the components of the girl’s wardrobe (however, if you do not live together, this is very problematic, but you can by observing the amount of daily changing clothes). If the number of her things enhances the effect of replenishing the wardrobe (i.e., she more and more often begins to ask her parents to earn money for the purchase of linen), then this is either due to the psyche or the desire to be attractive, attracting men's looks,
- Along with the lack of motivation to study, begins to train a lot in gyms, wanting to become slimmer. He tries new diets, sits on them for weeks and does not succumb to persuasion to eat,
- She preens for hours in front of a mirror, buys “tons” of new cosmetics.
All these factors are two-sided: on the one hand, the girl wants to look attractive in connection with the inferiority complex and the ideas manically affecting her consciousness to change so as not to receive negative reviews from others, on the other hand, she began to work hard for the new guy. Here it is more advisable to find out directly from her what caused the above before drawing any conclusions.
It is also worthwhile to understand that such behavior will sooner or later attract new boyfriends, so try to dissuade the girl from this therapy. But! Take the fact into service, since it is only a component of the full range of signs indicating the likelihood of treason.
How can I check?
How to find out if a loved one is cheating? For some people, the fact of fraud is easily verified - they just can't lie well. Therefore, the first way is to ask the girl about a likely betrayal.
She may deny it at first, but the words, the expression of her eyes will tell how much she is telling the truth.
Exclude pressure, aggression, physical impact. After all, if you find yourself wrong, the girl will have resentment.
The conversation should be calm, confident tone. The girl should not have the desire to lie, distort the facts. Aggression, however, causes fear, which means lack of frankness with you.
Another way that takes time is trace, observe.
He is not completely ethical from the point of view of morality, because he talks about distrust in advance, but sometimes it makes it possible to know exactly what the girl is doing, with whom she is dating and how honest she is with her partner.
You can check for cheating by observing the behavior during telephone conversations, receiving messages. Interesting Facts friends and girlfriends of a girl can tell.
However, rivals should be trusted with caution, as sometimes girlfriends exaggerate the facts. It is not always worth talking about your suspicions among friends, as gossip spreads quickly.
As a result, there are speculations of strangers that your girlfriend is cheating on you, distortion of facts and loss of respect from friends, because you become a person who forgives betrayal.
Signs of betrayal of a girl in mutual behavior.
The interaction and relationship of partners - this is a key component of love, to understand this is not so difficult. The very signs that the girl has changed or already found a potential partner are in negative manifestations against the boy. What attitude indicates the emergence of a new opponent on the horizon and what can force her to start a search? Let's analyze the points.
- Refusal of intimacy without reason and clearly reasoned reasons (suitable for the case if previously your intimacy was a completely natural event),
- Dating becomes rare and, more importantly, short-term (if it is not connected with studies, preparation for exams or defense of the thesis),
- Imaginary grounds are created for transferring pastime or reasons why you cannot meet your beloved, for example, from school,
- More often she wants to relax with her friends, she responds to your desire with nothing unsupported by refusal,
- It creates anti-moral situations that can lead you into a stupor, upset, humiliate your dignity, and let you know a completely different girl than you once met.
These are the most frequently manifested signs of adultery with a guarantee of 99.9%, which she is already cheating on.
What can make her start looking for a new partner? Your attitude:
- Checks for "lice", that is, imaginary inventing a case in which she was allegedly seen with another guy. At the same time, the clarification of the relationship "was there really a betrayal or only signs",
- Jealousy for “air”, observation of an imaginary tendency to cheat, arguing that she looked at another guy, talked with him, flirted, etc.,
- Obsession. She must be given freedom at this age, because she is not ready for marriage (if she is under 18 years old),
- Lack of help if she asks you for something important to her. This circumstance is equivalent to a disregarding attitude, from here it can drive into your head that you have stopped loving it or changing it,
- Hiding some facts, moving away from her during a telephone conversation (you might think that you are hiding something, for example, your signs of treason).
How to find out about a girl’s betrayal by personality type?
The lion's share of young men do not know how to recognize, to determine or learn about the betrayal of your girlfriend according to her personality type, we decided to be the first to reveal secrets, because the propensity for this kind of entertainment is written on the face of every person. We will introduce also types of temperaments to the description.
So, how to identify signs, what a girl cheated on you on the outlines of the face? The main ones are:
- The nose is straight, long, thin (people with a long nose constantly feel gluttony in bed close proximity, so changing them is not a big deal),
- The look is stupid, direct (one gets the impression that the girl either does not understand what they are talking about during the dialogue, or she has something in mind).
You can also learn about a predisposition to treason by behavior:
- The manifestation of aggression with uncomfortable questions, in clarifying the details of the circumstances of a particular incident in which she was directly involved,
- I do not care about the "do not care" attitude towards you and everyone who she does not like,
- Negative assessment of other girls, derogatory remarks addressed to them (often talks about acquaintances, cases of their infidelity, evaluates those who pass by, there is a lie in what was said about other representatives of the weaker sex),
- Violent reaction to the assessment, claims, criticism addressed to her, in fact, the suspicion of treason.
Temperaments with a predisposition (minus - no, plus - yes):
- Phlegmatic - (calm, quiet person, not ready for adventures of various kinds, including treason, does not allow new relationships in existing ones),
- Sanguine - / + (inconsistent personality, superficially related to life, problems and, in fact, relationships, will calm down in the event of the appearance of a child, some representatives tend to change),
- Choleric + (in case you don’t like something (during a scandal, for example), you can avenge your absurdity by changing with another guy),
- Melancholic - (believes in true love, but always searches for nourishment, is touchy on trifles, but will never betray),
- Phlegmatic sanguine - (obedience and sociability will not play a cruel joke with her, but you must leave free space for self-realization, otherwise it will quickly cool down to you),
- Phlegmatic melancholic - (for this type you are the one and only, even in the case of the formation of boyfriends on the horizon, it will be true and will not succumb to provocation),
- Sanguine choleric + (in a word, this person does not need anything in life, value guidelines are completely absent, as are moral principles, therefore, he will look through his fingers at his betrayal),
- A sanguine melancholic - / + (an indefinite person cannot fully understand how dear you are to her, therefore she is prone to constant checks of her own attachment to you - cheating),
- Melancholic choleric - (such a girl loves you, but in a relationship is not inferior in anything, this is an occasion for frequent abuse, but will not come to treason, rather, to part).
Having studied only all the signs of a girl’s infidelity, it is possible to mark some with a “tick”, and ask if there was a betrayal, already proceed from her reaction and draw conclusions.
How to recognize folk remedies?
How to catch her on treason? Physiological Signs Will Tell About Treason:
- unidentified spots, bruises on the girl’s body,
- less likely to have an orgasm during intimacy,
- changes in the menstrual cycle - the appearance of a new partner in some girls causes a malfunction in the arrival of menstruation,
- goes to the shower right after coming home,
- examine the genitals - if the proximity was recent, it will be noticeable by characteristic signs.
If a relationship has started a problem, but you want to keep it, start working on them.
But the allegations must be based on reliable facts and evidence.
How to declare a girl love? Psychological advice will help you!
In fact, to find out that a girl has changed is not so difficult, since the signs of a girl’s infidelity are banal to disgrace, you just need to remove the “pink glasses”. So, it is possible to understand the two-sidedness of her life by the following forms of behavior (and not only her):
- When you call, your society abruptly leaves (when answering the question: “Where are you going? What happened?”, Looks down at the floor and thinks up circumstances on the go),
- You used to walk until 21:00, now she claims that her parents only allow her to go for a walk until 19:00 (There are two stories here that reduce to one, parting, or mom is aware that she has another guy and is helping to make a choice on her own, or parents really against your relationship. Exceptional circumstances: doing homework, preparing for something important),
- If she often starts hanging out in another company or with friends without you, she informs you that she is at home, but doesn’t provide evidence - she changes
- She began to often spend the night with friends (at least she says so, but then again, there is no evidence) - a 100% sign of a girl’s betrayal,
- New gifts appeared that only a young man could give clearly, but it wasn’t you (flowers on her computer table, bracelets, hairpins, jewelry, soft toys with a love orientation),
- Change of marital status in social networks from “Meet” to “In Love” or “Actively Searching”, “Not Married” - it’s easy to understand that the girl has already changed or is just preparing for a change,
- She ceased to declare love on her own, does this only with a mutual response or with a reminder,
- Created a new page in the social. network, but did not add you as a friend,
- Returns from the walk very late (her parents know in advance that she didn’t go for a walk with you),
- He doesn’t tell you where he is going and with whom (when you try to check her location, he refuses, looks for an excuse not to cross with you in any way) - that means he is walking with someone with whom she has already changed,
- Refuses to give you a mobile phone, does not allow you to watch correspondence in accounts,
- Accuses you of treason, covering his signs,
- Often threatens to leave, if you do not comply with its guidelines (each time the threats increase, and the rules are tightened), conflicts become periodic.
How does a girl behave after adultery?
Residual signs that will reveal how to understand and discover, that your beloved girlfriend cheated on youwill be presented below. So, when the betrayal occurred:
- For no reason, I decided to dot all the “And” in your pair,
- If you created romance, like in a movie (flowers, restaurant, music, dancing), but you didn’t have such a picture before, and after that the girl burst into tears or said in a calm tone that she appreciates your step without showing any emotion - this is an occasion to think about her fidelity or her absence,
- On a date, she became too quiet (secretive, closed), her head bowed down, tries not to utter a word (or carefully selects them so as not to betray treason),
- When asked, “Has someone appeared at your place?”, Cheeks redden immediately, eyes start to run from side to side, palms sweat, wrists are squeezed into a lock.
Agree, understanding what is happening behind your back is not a big deal, but high rates of a surge of negative emotions interfere when you start to suspect your beloved. At this moment, I want to hear more the answer “Yes, I’m cheating!” And disperse without torturing myself and the girl.
It is more advisable to leave at the moment of loss of confidence, since there is a risk of destruction of the physiological processes of the brain, from which it is later difficult to recover. Take care of yourself first!
If you dreamed of a girl’s betrayal, this does not guarantee that you somehow became a psychic and recognized the girl’s betrayal by signs from a dream (see Dream: the girl has changed. What does it mean?). For the rest, rely on information from the material.
Since you can find out the girl’s betrayal by passing the test, we recommend that you do not miss this opportunity. For the result to be accurate, please answer truthfully.