The first meeting with new people is considered the most difficult for most. Everyone wants to make a good impression and adhere to all the rules of etiquette. At the first communication, it is very difficult not to be nervous and try to find common topics for conversation. However, if you worry too much, you can only exacerbate the situation.
In order to understand how to get to know people, it is necessary to adhere to several recommendations. They will help to adhere to all standards of etiquette and quickly make new friends.
How to introduce yourself
Any acquaintance with new people must begin with the fact that each of the interlocutors calls his name. It is also worthwhile to figure out what kind of environment accompanies communication. If we are talking about an official or business meeting and one of its participants needs to turn to another, then first of all you need to tell the stranger your last name, first name, and middle name. However, in this case we are talking about precisely those situations when a certain number of people are present at the meeting who come together about a job or other official topic.
If a person just wants to ask a passerby for the way to the nearest metro, then in this case, of course, you do not need to introduce yourself. Simply apologize for the concern and clarify the necessary information.
If we are talking about how to introduce ourselves when meeting a woman, then the first person to give his name is a male representative. However, you should pay attention to some exceptions to this rule. For example, if a girl is a student who first sees her teacher, then in this case she must name her first name, last name and patronymic first. The same applies to situations in which the fair sex occupies a position in the service below her new interlocutor. If a girl turns to an elderly man, then she should also introduce herself first.
- Dating Methods
Subscribe to event announcements and visit the ones that are most interesting to you. It is important to ask the name of a new friend and immediately add to friends on social networks, otherwise an interesting person will be lost. Sharing business cards is just as important.
2) Social networks.
Write interesting posts. Comment on strangers. Ask those who are added to you, what they do. Yes, a lot of time is wasted, but we are looking for interesting people. And be sure to add new friends as friends. You will be surprised how many interesting people live with you in the same city! Social networks help you find like-minded people without risk.
3) Friends of friends.
Ask you to meet interesting people. Feel free to call and write! Just do the preliminary work: how, in turn, can you be useful? What topic are you ready to discuss?
- The right attitude to new acquaintances
1) Live here now. First of all, you should stop worrying about what they think about you, and just start enjoying a new conversation. Forget about your expectations and fears, let the conversation flow naturally and organically. Learn to concentrate on other people so as not to miss the thread of the conversation and follow the line of condemnation.
2) Stop being insecure and constantly seek the approval of others. The need for emotional support is a harbinger of obsession, which is not normal. Such people are unbalanced and unstable, because their happiness depends too much on someone else. If you feel that you will be crushed, if a person does not want to be your friend or partner in a relationship, it is time to stop, be patient and analyze yourself.
3) Keep your confidence. You may doubt yourself, but by maintaining confidence, you will allow other people to feel that you are worth it to communicate with you. Relieve confidence even before you enter a room with strangers and strengthen it when talking. Just smile, talk about your favorite things, show others that you are happy with yourself, with where you are and what you do. Sign language helps you stay confident. Spread your shoulders, maintain eye contact, do not make fussy movements with your hands and do not look at the floor.
4) Radiate positive energy. However, do not try to look too enthusiastic. Smile and laugh from time to time, do not stand with a strange smirk on your face and do not laugh at what is not funny.
- Tips and comments
Not every type of communication is fruitful. The benefit of communication can be obtained only when each side of it is open towards each other, and does not hide behind a wall of formal rules that protect the intimate space of the person. When each person involved in the communication process listens attentively and watches, and not just waits for his turn to speak. When each opinion complements the other, and does not oppose it.
Chat! Do not be bothered by communications. They will enrich your personality and make your position in this world more stable and stable thanks to the support of others and attention. Meet new people. Be open, liberated, and frank! Do not be afraid of people.
Revive old ties. Learn from the knowledge and experience that surrounds them. Take over their strengths and avoid other people's mistakes. Be open to new opinions. Try to understand the other person. Ask yourself: “Why does he think so? Why does he act? ”Put yourself in the shoes of other people.
Avoid hatred, envy, gloating. Remember, all people are your reflection. And that, for which you can hate someone, is (or was) also yourself. Sincerely admire others and praise them. Notice the good in them, and do not focus only on the bad.
Stop labeling others. Change your dislike for interest and curiosity. Be prepared to help. Be lenient and tolerant. Remember, the world does not revolve around you alone, you lose a lot if you neglect other people's experience and those lessons that can be learned from real, open communication!
Each person is a unique experience generated by completely unique conditions, unique abilities and unique personality development! Take this experience and use it!
You may also be interested in an article on the psychology of relationships.
Understanding how to get to know people, it is important to understand not only the basic manners and rules of etiquette. It is important not only to introduce oneself, but also to interest a new interlocutor.
Deep in the soul, each person is a full-fledged egoist. Therefore, you need to understand the nature of dating. When one person gets to know someone (perhaps this is an object of sympathy or a potential business partner), then in this case, on a subconscious level, he seeks some benefit from this communication. However, you must hide your interests, even if they are not selfish. For example, when deciding how to meet an attractive person on the street, you should not immediately tell her about your ardent desire to spend an evening with her.
The beginning of communication should be detached so that the person does not understand that they are using it for one purpose or another. In addition, many people need a lot of time to trust a new acquaintance. Therefore, you should not immediately ask a new acquaintance about his family and relationships on the love front.
How to behave in the first conversation
The first impression is the most important. Therefore, having understood human psychology and how to get to know people, it is worth remembering the basic rules of conversation.
First of all, it is important to show a strong interest in every word that the interlocutor says. If even what he says seems completely typical or uninteresting, then in no case should you start digging into your phone or watch other people. This will greatly offend a new acquaintance, and most likely he will try to end the conversation as quickly as possible.
It is worth participating in the conversation, and not just waiting for the monologue of the interlocutor to end. In this case, it is desirable to maintain eye contact. However, do not look point blank. It is necessary to show interest and concentrate on the person’s face.
At any seminar on how to learn how to get to know people in different situations, it is primarily said that a person should radiate cheerfulness. Few people are interested in a gloomy interlocutor who sees the world exclusively in gray tones.
However, smiling is an exceptionally sincere smile. Stretched falseness very easily catches the eye and begins to annoy. Especially if a person is inexperienced in how to get to know people in order to make a better impression of themselves.
Name of interlocutor
During a conversation, it is recommended to call another person by name. Absolutely everyone likes the way it sounds. Calling a person by name makes it much easier to get close to him. After all, from childhood everyone is taught that strangers should not be trusted. However, if the interlocutor knows the name of another person, then they are already familiar and can communicate more naturally.
If we are talking about a girl, do not distort her name, believing that this will be regarded as a manifestation of sympathy. During the first communication it is enough to call the full name. Later, after a longer conversation, you can include in your speech more affectionate variations of the name of the object of adoration. However, if we are talking about a colleague with whom we can have exclusively business relations, then we should not switch to such frivolities.
If we are talking about a person about whom there is at least some kind of information, then it is worth finding common points of contact. It is necessary to choose the topic that will be clearly interesting to him.
If you are a stranger, then it is worth starting a conversation with common topics (for example, talking about the weather or the latest news). When it comes to friendly communication, in this case you can ask what kind of music the interlocutor is listening to, what kind of sports he is engaged in, etc.
If it becomes obvious that the interlocutor is losing interest in the conversation, then you should immediately change the topic.
How not to be shy to meet people and be interesting in communication
In order to learn how to make a good impression and interest others in yourself, you need to become a more versatile person. Anyone who is interested in the world around him is always in the spotlight. Therefore, you should not concentrate only on yourself.
If at first the acquaintance is embarrassing, then you can conduct a little training. For example, you need to make it a rule to approach strangers on the street and ask them for directions or time. This will help to overcome the psychological barrier in communicating with new interlocutors.
It is very difficult for some to perform even this simple exercise. Do not despair. In the age of computer technology, it is much easier to communicate on the Internet. Therefore, you can practice in the virtual world.
How to meet people in the social. networks
If the purpose of dating is relationships (this happens most often), then first of all it is worth deciding what kind of communication will be. If you have serious intentions, you should pay more attention to your profile.
For example, if a young man liked a girl, but on his page there are pictures of half-naked beauties, then the lady will not take him seriously. Therefore, you need to remove all unnecessary images and leave the highest quality. Profiles, in which there are no photos at all, also do not cause people to be interested. Most often, they believe that a maniac or just an unattractive person is hiding behind a faceless avatar.
To impress the virtual interlocutor or the interlocutor, do not start communication with hackneyed phrases and the question "How are you?" It is better to study the page, the person who caused interest, and pay attention to what he likes. For example, if a guy is interested in cars, you can ask him what movie he would recommend about racing drivers.
How to meet on the street
In this matter, the most difficult thing is to get rid of fears. Many fear that when they try to meet people, they will look at them with surprised eyes or even begin to show aggression. If we are talking about a girl you like, then experienced seducers recommend first to work out with people who are more willing to engage in dialogue.
For example, in almost every yard there will always be several grandmothers who are sitting on a bench, desperate for communication with the outside world. Suffice it to say that lately there has been unbearable heat or cold, and the conversation will flow like a river.
Another option and a great workout to help overcome embarrassment is to smile at casual passers-by. Most people will necessarily respond to such a positive gesture and give a reciprocal smile.
It is also worth starting to say hello to all neighbors and those people who are not the first time to meet in a store or on the way to work. Having a greeting is much easier to start a conversation. For example, it can be noted that a guy constantly sees a girl in a store, which means that good products are sold in him, etc.
It is very easy to start dating while standing in line. Usually in this situation, people are united by a common discontent. For example, it’s enough to say: “How tedious it is to queue,” and nearby someone will definitely agree with this statement.
Thus, the problem of how to get to know people will cease to be so serious.
Any communication should be positive. If we are talking about the first conversation and acquaintance, then you should not behave aggressively or try to impose your communication. If a stranger is not inclined to make new friends, do not put too much pressure on him.
It is also important to remember that you need to be able not only to get to know each other correctly, but also to be able to support further communication. Even the best first impression is pretty easy to spoil with just one rash phrase. Therefore, do not touch on topics of politics, religion, race or gender. It is better if the beginning of communication will be exclusively on a distant topic in which the opinion of most people converges. Then it will be easy to make new acquaintances.